Prayer Request...

So there has been a lot of stress that Jared and I have been under lately. I have had to hardest time finding a job, and some people are thinking I'm just being too picky...saying, "It's all about the money" to just find something that pays well. And no, I'm sorry tis not all about the money. Tis better to be happy than wealthy. Yes, money help us get through life, but tis not all there is to life. I've always told myself I'm not going to work somewhere where I'm not happy. It would only be a "chasing after the wind."

What does the worker gain from his toil? I have seen the burden God has laid on men. He had made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from the beginning to end. I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil--that is the gift of God I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him.
Ecclesiastes 3:9-14

Some days I feel as if I am living in Ecclesiastes...while it is one of my favorite books of the Bible, I don't feel like always have to explain myself to the same people on almost a daily basis. I want to work at a place I enjoy, so I don't toil in vain...so I won't be chasing after happiness in a place where it won't be achieved. I choose HAPPINESS!

Better one handful with tranquility than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind.
Ecclesiastes 4:6

So to the prayer request the title insinuates...There have been a lot of open doors for both Jared and I that right as we start to step through they slam in our faces. Yes...yes...yes I know this means that they weren't the right doors, but it seems for me since we've been down here no door has been the right door, and here recently a huge opportunity opened up for Jared and totally clasped right in front of him. What I'm getting at is we need the right doors to open and stay opened...we need a way to get out of his parents' house and begin married life the way it is meant to be. We are praying for a better job opportunity for Jared, he has a great job has it is and get paid well, when he has the hours, but down here there isn't a high demand for his work right now meaning low hours. We either need a higher position, with guaranteed hours or salary. And for me I just need a job period...I had a call this morning for a job interview on Thursday, and I really need prayer on this one...prayer for peace. We also need prayer for wisdom in the steps we take and the way to handle certain situations. And a big one is prayer for understanding for both Jared and I on why things are going the way they are, and also for the people we are dealing with to understand why we live/make decisions the way we do (Biblically) because for some reason they aren't understanding.

Happy Birthday Danielle!!!

Happy Birthday Danielle!
That year flew by! I remember the kids and I making your birthday card last year...that was so much fun! I pray more blessings for you, the family, and the year to come! Hope you have a WONDERFUL birthday!

Elisha

Apologies...

This is my apology to those who may be reading my blog! Not to be making excuses...I've had a pretty rough couple of weeks. The roughness is just starting and will probably be here for a while, but God is showing me that for the last two-three weeks I've been dealing with it completely wrong. I've lost my positiveness in this aspect which totally disturbs me because positiveness is who I am. I cling to positiveness...it makes me me and keeps me happy. God is positiveness and I cling to Him which is how I discovered my short coming. Though there will be days, moments, times where I probably will slip back into my horrible, frustrated mood...we all slip, but that's where God comes in and lifts me back up! So please consider this my written apology for the past few negative...frustrating blogs!

Frustration...

Frustration plagues my life right now...almost everywhere I turn frustration is there. Seriously people I'm just trying to get life in order, trying to find a job (and so far getting no where), debt in order and paid off, unagreed on debt taking care off, and just getting to a place where I'm comfortable and able to get a place of our own. All I'm getting right now is yelled at and frustrated. God, I know you won't give me anything I can't handle...please help!!!!!! There are too many tears in my life right now and I HATE crying!

Absence...

To all you blog readers out there...
Sorry for my long extended absence. I've been going through a lot lately. Extreme sickness (Flu-ish with a temp of 102.5) for a week, a lot of emotional things are coming back up and I've been having to think...think...think! Sorry for being gone so long...

PAIN...

I'm angry for how you've hurt me! All the ways you've hurt me: broken promises, never caring, innocence turned to shame, hurtful words, lies, lies, and MORE LIES...EVERYTHING! All you've ever done is hurt me!
I did things you enjoyed in hopes you'd notice me, be proud of me, and in turn love me too...did it work? ...NO...
I quasi-excelled in school in hopes you'd noticed me, be proud of me, and in turn love me too...did it work? ...NO...
Why did you steal from me...steal everything from me? My pictures, my identity, my good name, my life?
Why did you break my trust time...after time...after time...after time?
Are you trying to ruin my life?
Why can't I believe anything you say anymore?
...even when you say "I love you"...why can't I believe you?
I'm afraid of getting hurt again...I'm afraid to trust you...I'm afraid to believe you. Though I knew it was true long before, it killed me inside when you admitted you didn't care about me the first 18 years of my life. It hurt when you told me I was the source of the problem. You've hurt me in so many ways!
::I NEED TO GET THIS OUT...I NEED TO LET THIS GO::
I want to say I hate you, but I know I don't. I want to say I've never loved you, but I always have. I use to look up to you. I use to admire you. Now I just feel sorry for you. I try to pray for you, honestly it hurts...but I still do. I also pray someday I can finally trust you, and finally believe you again...someday....

My Mother-in-law

My mother-in-law is as sweet as can be (one of the nicest people I know). Earlier while I was straightening mine and Jared's room and having a chat with Addison (the 3-year-old my mother-in-law nannys) Barb walked in to ask my advice about her hair...she likes it short but my father-in-law likes it long. While we were talking Addison was running and jumping onto our amazing pod chair (pretty much entertaining herself while trying to attract attention (like all 3-year-olds do) and I was making our bed and Barb was seated on the coffee table. I turn around to find while we were talking she was rearranging our diffuser sticks (::RED ALERT::). To recap a previous blog...I'm weird about people messing with the diffuser sticks. I held my cool and didn't freak out (on the outside) and once she left rushed to fix them back the way they go...

SAD! I know...I know, but hey at least I held my cool while she was in the room :-)